Choosing a known sperm donor for your family is a significant decision for prospective parents embarking on the journey to parenthood. The process can be overwhelming given the multitude of factors to consider. However, with careful consideration and informed decision-making, you can select a donor that aligns with your values, preferences, and the health considerations important to you. Here are some tips to help guide you through the process:
1. How to Choose a Sperm Donor: Consider Your Priorities
Begin by determining what characteristics are most important to you in a donor. These might include health history, physical attributes (like height, skin tone, eye color or hair color), ethnicity, educational background, athletic abilities, or interests. Understanding your priorities will help narrow down the selection process. A good rule of thumb is to pick your top 3 priorities and begin narrowing your search within those parameters.
2. Medical History Compatibility Review and Genetic History
When choosing a life partner, many individuals do not consider medical or genetic compatibility. With known sperm donors, you have the opportunity to carefully review family medical histories and genetic screening results before moving forward.
Medical History: Prior to starting your journey, you should decide what you would consider a deal breaker in a donor's medical history. This may include a donor's diagnosis of a condition that runs in your family, or a strong prevalence of autoimmune conditions within the donor's family. These deal breakers can help narrow down your options. At The Seed Scout, donors complete an extensive questionnaire to ensure that we are capturing the full family medical history. You have an option to review these with a genetic counselor to learn about the inheritability of different conditions.
Genetic carrier screening: Carrier screening can also help narrow down your list. All donors at The Seed Scout complete a carrier gene screening panel to ensure the biological parent and donor don't share any genes in common. If the two share the same carrier gene, all offspring would have a 25% chance of inheriting a genetic condition (e.g. Cystic Fibrosis, Congenital Adrenal Hyperplasia).
3. Get to Know the Donor
The Seed Scout is able to provide a glimpse into who your future known donor is through our personal impressions we document thoroughly during their intake. Additionally, you have the chance to meet with with your top two favorite donors before making a final decision. The chance to meet and discuss important topics and questions with your potential future donor is a great way to assess if they would be a good fit. This can offer insights into the donor's personality, motivations for donating, and life philosophy. This qualitative information can help you feel a connection to the donor and assist in making a decision that feels right to you.
4. Understand Sibling Pod Implications
The Seed Scout only matches donors with a maximum of three families. Each family who shares the same Seed Scout donor will be introduced to each other. You should consider if you have a strong preference towards being matched with a donor who might donate to two other families with The Seed Scout or if you'd prefer to utilize an Exclusive Donor. An Exclusive Donor means that the donor will only be matched with your family and no other Seed Scout clients.
5. Professional Counseling
Consider seeking professional counseling from a fertility counselor who specializes in donor conception. They can provide valuable guidance and support, helping you navigate your feelings and make a decision that aligns with your emotional and psychological well-being.
Conclusion
Selecting your known sperm donor is a deeply personal and important decision. By taking the time to consider your priorities, reviewing medical and genetic information, and understanding the legal and emotional implications, you can make an informed choice that best suits your path to parenthood. Remember, there is no "perfect" donor, but with thoughtful consideration, you can select a donor that best suits your families' needs.